Wizards, Run!

"I did the only thing any reasonable wizard could have done. I turned around and ran like hell." --Harry Dresden (in Jim Butcher's Death Masks)

"Foot chases still happened often enough that I had taken up running for practice and exercise. Admittedly, I was usually on the other side of a food chase, mostly due to my personal policies on hand-to-hand combat with anything that weighed more than a small car or could be described with the word chitinous." --Harry Dresden (in Jim Butcher's Blood Rites)

"Now, I'm not as strong as those really big guys. . . . I don't do swordplay as well as [other folks]. I don't yet have the magical experience and know-how to outfinesse the really experienced wizards and sorcerers who have been hanging around for centuries. . . . But I'll take any of those guys in a footrace. Guaranteed. I run -- and not so that I'll be skinny and look good, either. I run so that when something that wants to kill me is chasing me, I'll be good at running." --Harry Dresden (in Jim Butcher's Small Favor)

James Marsters rocks as the audiobook narrator.

We all have different preferences when it comes to exercise; one of the reasons it took me so long to become "athletic" is that I disliked traditional sports and loathed running. I had mild asthma as a kid and no grit or mental determination to push things physically. Why should I bother? I thought. There are plenty of good books I could read instead.

One of my favorite book series, The Dresden Files by Jim Butcher (no, NOT the TV show on Netflix that never happened), is about a wizard living in modern-day Chicago. What starts out as a fun sci-fi/fantasy series featuring a snarky guy who can do some magic evolves into a compelling, dark, and intricately designed storyline featuring a snarky guy who can do a lot of magic. I highly recommend giving the series a try if you haven't read it; book #10 is my favorite and #12 just leaves you on an insane "WHAT?!" moment. (There were only 12 books out when I got into the series; be glad you can now go straight on to 13 and 14.)

Anyway, one of the neat things about the books is the character development: Harry Dresden faces a lot, and you see him make tough choices, experience loss, learn from his mistakes, and really come into his own as a powerful contender in the magical community. He's bold, he's chivalrous, he's sassy, and he's smart enough to realize that sometimes he's outclassed, and running away is the best bet.

It's got fangs!

I took a gun safety class once, and the instructor called it the "Nike defense." When I took a krav maga (Israeli self-defense and street combat) class, the instructors stressed that your legs are your best weapon; run away when possible. Similarly, when discussing a hypothetical knife fight, the self-defense instructor at my kung fu school reminded us that Rule #1 of a knife fight is "Don't get into a knife fight." (Rule #2? If you're in a knife fight, bring a knife.) The TL;DR version of all of these safety tips comes down to this: Trouble? RUN.

My roommate in college was a cross-country runner, and when we were out in the city together, we always joked that she was "Flight" and I was "Fight" -- we had this glamorous notion that I'd hold off Scary Attacker Guy with my Tiny Girl Kung Fu and she'd run for help. The problem with this is, of course, that I have zero fighting experience whatsoever. I've taken a class here and there and live with 3 martial artists, but I'm no MMA fighter in disguise (yet?), and I wasn't doing CrossFit yet either, so my strength was pretty lacking -- and my running stamina was equally nonexistent.

CrossFit has definitely increased my athletic capacity, and there are running components to a number of the workouts. But Tough Mudder was the first long-distance event I'd ever done, and it was more of a walk/jog/shamble combination than a nice long run. You will frequently find me during running CrossFit workouts gasping "This is what death feels like" in an over-dramatic fashion. And while I don't aspire to be a marathoner, I'd like to have a fair shot of surviving the zombie apocalypse -- which means better running stamina. (I'm also a terribly slow sprinter, so add "speed" to the list of things to work on.)

I finally took a leaf out of Harry Dresden's book and decided that it wouldn't hurt to work on running, just a little bit. So when my coworkers asked me to sign up for a 5k with them, I allowed myself to be talked into it. And when I nervously went for a run with those coworkers a few weeks ago, I had a revelation: you can run as slow as you want. I always think that I need to charge out there and get it done, and I couldn't fathom running 3.1 miles without stopping until my coworkers (with the help of the Nike+ running app) showed me that pacing is key. I suddenly discovered that if we're talking a 13-minute mile, I can shamble along quite nicely without stopping to walk.

Talk about motivation!

I may never love running long distances, and I can get both the enjoyment and the fitness I want from CrossFit, martial arts, parkour, etc. But my glacial 12-13 minute mile pace is a step towards increasing both my mental and physical endurance, and it gives me a target to work at improving. Since the run with my coworkers, I've used the inspiration as well as both the Zombies, Run! app and the Nike+ run tracker and headed out into the beautiful fall weather on my "rest" days to log two 1-2+ mile runs without taking a single break to walk. I'd say that's a pretty good start. Bring it on, 5k!

--Simone

Zombies, Run 5k Trainer Review

Six weeks ago I embarked on a quest to become a distance runner. 

I didn't wake up at 250 lbs and say, "I'm going to run this weight off, hooray!" Hell no. I quit the cross country team two weeks into the first semester of my freshman year of high school. Growing up, running made me feel like I was going to die.

I never experienced runner's high, just runner's hell.

It wasn't until I lost some of the weight I'd been holding on to for years, realized I'd be out of town and away from the gym for several weeks during the summer, and started using the character I was preparing to cosplay as an inspiration for my workout routine that I finally decided to give running a real chance. I committed myself to at least eight weeks of running training with Couch to 5k. However, no sooner had I started my first week than someone brought Zombies, Run to my attention. It's an app that turns your boring, soul-sucking run into a post apocalyptic race for survival. That's right, fellow nerds! There's a fitness RPG for your phone that will knock your socks off and change the way you look at running forever, or at least that's what it did for me. You can collect resources and build up your base to resist attacks and of course, you can use all the statistics that the app tracks to see how you're doing as far as speed, distance, and much more. They have a website where you can log in and see detailed analysis of your run on a GPS map and accompanying timeline of the music that was playing and the descriptions of the part of the training program that you were on at the time. In this way, you can see how certain exercises affected you and how specific songs or locations may have influenced your run. When something matches fitness, entertainment, and geekdom this fantastically, I just can't resist.

As someone who couldn't run for any serious distances, I was really happy to see that they had a Couch to 5k equivalent. Zombies, Run 5k Training builds up your capacity for distance running while roping you into it's own engrossing story line that keeps you coming back for more in your quest to train as a "runner," one of Abel township's most valuable resources. In the world of Zombies, Run, runners function as lines of communication to the outside world, rescue mission operatives, and collectors for survival gear in the area. Rather than fight the zombies, your job is to move as quickly and quietly as you can so as not to attract undue attention, but more often then not, you do end up outrunning your fair share of hordes while you're out on missions. There's nothing like the fear of having your brains ripped out of your head and eaten by hungry zombies to keep you running at a good clip even when you feel like you want to stop pushing yourself. 

With Zombies, Run 5k Training, you have three missions to complete per week for eight weeks that get you in good enough shape to complete a 5k without stopping to walk. You can repeat missions if you're not ready to move on and all the distance running is labeled as "freeform" (run or walk if you need to).

Here are the pros. The story keeps me invested in my training even when I don't feel like I want to work out. The voice acting is surprisingly great! There is a colorful cast of characters and I always look forward to the times when I get to learn more about them. There's a great mix of drama, comedy, and color commentary on the exercises you're being asked to do during drills (high knees, heel lifts, skipping, etc.). I love inhabiting the character of Runner 5. Going on rescue and resource missions makes me feel like a badass. You can create a workout playlist and use it through the app so that the mission directions and storyline play on top of it throughout your workout. You can use GPS or the accelerometer to track your stats which means if you have bad weather or you prefer to use a treadmill on a regular basis, you have that option available to you. I love being able to assess my improvement or any shortcomings by looking at my run stats on the website. Every week when a new mission program comes up, I always think that it will be an insurmountable challenge, and yet every time I step up to the plate, I finish just fine- not easily, but I feel like my training has really paid off. However they put together the progression of the missions, I completely trust it because I've never felt the need to repeat a mission along the way and I've never stopped to walk during my "freeruns." You can also share your maps and your runs on Facebook and Twitter, which can be fun as well if you're into that sort of thing. The bottom line is that this app makes me look forward to doing something I've always hated. 

Here are the cons. The app does glitch out sometimes. The music player has trouble with large playlists and will sometimes tell you it can't use certain tracks. I usually select "run anyway" and it still has plenty of songs to choose from, but it is a drag that the bug hasn't been fixed despite complaints on their website and in iTunes reviews. Personally, I've used the accelerometer feature over the GPS twice on the treadmill to avoid dangerous running conditions due to inclement weather. The first time it completely bugged out my workout playlist and no music would play. I fixed it by selecting a different playlist but every few minutes it would stop playing any music at all and I'd have stop the mission and restart it. No one wants to be constantly fiddling with their phone and pulling it in and out of their pocket while they're running. It's distracting and very annoying. I got through it, but the statistics were pretty much useless when that happened because my mission got recorded in 4-5 separate pieces. At the very least it didn't make me start the whole mission over every time or I would have rage quit. If running on a treadmill is your thing, I have to say it isn't the best for this particular training app because there are several missions that ask you to stop and do heel lifts, squats, or stretches, causing you to constantly pause your machine. It's also frustrating to constantly be changing the speed on the treadmill to match the commands that the trainer is giving you. Maybe this wouldn't be an issue with the regular Zombies, Run app, but I'm not sure as I haven't had a chance to dig into that yet. The only other bug I've seen is that sometimes it doesn't immediately record my training session statistics on the website. This has happened twice over the six weeks I've used it and the stats usually show up when I complete the following mission. It's not like they're lost or I'm aren't permitted to continue to the next level, but they just don't show up for whatever reason which is a drag. 

Honestly, despite the bugs I mentioned, this is one of the best fitness apps I've ever used. It's taken me from zero to near hero in just six weeks and I can't wait to sink my teeth into the regular Zombies, Run app when I'm done. It's well worth the little bit of money it takes to purchase it and the fun you'll have becoming "Runner 5" will make you wonder why you didn't start running sooner.