Call to Arms: Childhood Obesity Amongst Geeks

I'm putting out a call to arms. This country has a real obesity problem and it starts with our kids. I feel like our wee nerdlettes have it even worse because society expects them to grow up in their mom's basement, stuffing themselves with Doritos and pizza and not contributing to society beyond fighting over the conclusion of Battlestar Galactica on web forums. 

I'm not a nutritionist and I'm not a physician, but I am one of those former-fat-kid-dreamers who is fighting her way to a healthier adulthood without rejecting her fandom or blaming it. I don't think loving comics, scifi, and fantasy is an obesity death sentence like some people do. Geeks are naturally obsessive so if they can obsess about what inspires them, they tend to be more unstoppable than ANY other section of society. At least, that's my opinion and I am terribly biased! I've said this many times on this blog but I had one major mental shift that helped me want change, rather than being told I needed to make it. 

I don't want to watch heroes. I want to be the hero in the epic tale of my life. 

Kids these days are so detached from what they do and what they eat. Some don't even know what fresh food is or where it comes from. 

Heroes are people they admire in TV shows or movies or they play them as avatars in video games. Sure, they want to be like Thor, train Pokemon like Ash, or adorably parkour around obstacles like Rapunzel from Tangled, but what if that went beyond simply playing dress-up or appeasing their interest with more content featuring those characters. What if we could get them in touch with what those characters actually do and stand for so that they can put those things into action in their own lives. 

What if we could show them what Chris Hemsworth does to train for Thor and helped them learn how to do a popper sit-up or push-up? What if we took them to a beginner parkour class so they could pull Assassin's Creed stunts? What if we encourage them to build an adventurer's heart like The Doctor! What if we got them into water bending by doing tai chi in the mornings? What if we taught them to cook food that looks like it came out of a Ghibli film so that they could grow up with the power to feed their health rather than their impulses? 

It's gotta be possible. We should be leading the way for the next generation. I don't have kids but I've spent some time as a mentor and as a camp counselor and I'm pretty passionate about being a good influence on our youth. I want to start taking Project Reroll into that realm. If have any readers with kids, younger siblings, or even people they babysit up to 17 years old, I'd like to issue my first "Mini Slayer" challenge.

The Mini Slayer Halloween Challenge

This week is Halloween, incidentally one of my favorite holidays because we get to ask ourselves what and who we want to be! It's incredibly empowering! 

• The first step is to take a picture of the kid participating in the challenge in their Halloween costume and have them write a sentence about why they chose be that thing/person. 
• Then, for just one week following Halloween (Friday to Friday), you and the young slayer participating will agree to do three active adventures based on the theme of their costume. This could be going for nature walks if they were Poison Ivy or finding your center with some Yoga Jedi training. Get creative! Make it something they're excited about!
• The second part of the challenge deals with diet. Aside from one piece of candy a day, you will agree to make every meal using fresh, non processed food and that you will eat at least one serving of vegetables and one serving of fruit each day. You do not have to eat Paleo, but ideally this whole plan will force you to spend a little time talking about food and cooking together each day.
• At the end, I'd love to hear about some of the meals you made and see pictures from the activities you did so I can share them here, on our Facebook page and on Twitter. There's no scale or measurements involved here. It's just about using fantasy to inspire and integrate active and healthier experiences into a kid's life for one week. 

Please send all photos and descriptions of your experiences to contactprojectreroll@gmail.com and leave a comment here if you're planning to participate so I can be on the look out for submissions! Best of luck Slayers! I choose you!

The end of the 31 day challenge and how Bruce Lee is always right

So we’re on the other side of the 31 day challenge and I ended it as it began. With hope.

I am 20 lbs lighter than when I started. I have a whole new outlook on life, food, my health, and more importantly my body.

I’ve seen the scale go up and down during this 31 days. I’ve hit new marks on the scale I never thought I would and I’ve never been prouder in myself. For me...being proud in myself is a big accomplishment.

So I’d like to share some quick notes on what I learned and then tell you about what’s coming next.

1) EVERYONE has an idea about what works and what doesn’t.
“Don't get set into one form, adapt it and build your own, and let it grow, be like water. Empty your mind, be formless, shapeless — like water. Now you put water in a cup, it becomes the cup; You put water into a bottle it becomes the bottle; You put it in a teapot it becomes the teapot. Now water can flow or it can crash. Be water, my friend.”

Here’s the hard truth...people will give you advice, tell you what worked for them, and how what you’re doing isn’t going to work. What you need to do is be like Bruce Lee says and when it comes to this advice “be like water”. The quote helps me alot in all areas of life and maybe it will help you.

2) Not everyone’s body is meant to be the same.
“Always be yourself, express yourself, have faith in yourself, do not go out and look for a successful personality and duplicate it.” Bruce Lee

We’re not all cookie cutter versions of the same form and structure. Sure there are steps we can all take, but not all diets and workouts work for everyone. Some people have food allergies that prevent them from experiencing some diets. Some people can’t just jump into a heavy workout and need to build up to it. Listen to your body and what works for you. Find the workout you can’t live without when you get started. Find the diet that doesn’t make you cringe. Or, like me, try everything and see what works. Be open to all possibilities, but do it for you and not because it worked for a friend or celebrity.

3) If you’re not committed to change…nothing will happen.
“If you spend too much time thinking about a thing, you'll never get it done.” Bruce Lee

You have to take action. Even small ones to start. It’s perpetual motion after that, one foot in front of the other, but you have to commit to that next step. You have to know what you are doing this for and focus on that. Otherwise you won’t have the energy, will, or desire to change for yourself.

Don’t think too hard...do. And remember the wise words of Yoda, “Do or do not. There is no try.” And if you are not going to do it...the don’t, but don’t make excuses. You have to find what works for you and go after that like tomorrow does not exist.

4) It’s going to suck sometimes...but it’s worth it.
“A goal is not always meant to be reached, it often serves simply as something to aim at.” Bruce Lee

Whether it is a juice diet, a regular diet, or working out...when you start it is going to suck. If it was easy everyone would be doing it. You have to know that going in. If you do, the mental hurdles will be easier to overcome. You have to start putting things in your eye sight that remind you and make you want to change.

5) Accept that not everyone is going through what you are...it’s not about them.
“I'm not in this world to live up to your expectations and you're not in this world to live up to mine.” Bruce Lee

Whether you have a spouse, a girlfriend/boyfriend, or are living with friends or family do not expect everyone to be doing what you are. This isn’t being done for them or about them. They are not required to follow your diet or tip toe around you to make sure you “feel safe.”

While I was on my juice fast my wife brought home fast food. I could have been angry. I could have yelled about “I’m doing this thing...and you bring in that temptation.” But what I did was recognize that she made her choice and I was making mine. We were both doing what works for us. I saw in that food she brought home every bad decision I made to cause this weight gain and I enjoyed my juice knowing I didn’t want to get back there.

I hate to break it to you, but when you go outside...the world does not conform itself to you. You have to live your life during this transition with zero expectations of anyone around you, but appreciate when they make exceptions for you.

6) You’re going to make mistakes/have set backs/stumble.
“Mistakes are always forgivable, if one has the courage to admit them.” Bruce Lee

You’re going to have days where you want to cheat, the scale goes up instead of down, and you’ll miss a workout. Don’t make a mountain out of it. Own it, know what caused the chain of events that caused it to happen, and be ready for when that scenario presents itself again.

I lost over 10 pounds and got upset when I saw the scale go up a bit. It almost broke me, but I remembered to celebrate the loss and not the gain. The gain is just another obstacle to overcome.

Just do not let whatever that mistake is to become the lynchpin that completely destroys your progress. Remember how far you’ve come.

7) If it doesn’t mean something to you...it doesn’t matter how many people congratulate you.
“As you think, so shall you become.” Bruce Lee

You have to want this change! You have to embrace it and know that it’s what you want more than gaining weight. You can never be the person you were again. You have to rewrite the story in your brain and see yourself as the person you want to become. Believe you are a person who can do a 10 day juice challenge. Believe you can, be ready to face adversity in every form, and you can do whatever you dream.

So what comes next?

My amazing friend Elizabeth Wallace put up a challenge to me. She bought me the Chalene Extreme workout DVD’s and challenged me to do that work out three days a week. So I’ll be doing that and reviewing the process here on Project Reroll. That combined with a paleo like diet (I’m evolving into it) I am on track to lose another 20 lbs by the end of November. I want to keep this up and by January be 60 pounds lighter.

I am going to end this with one of my favorite quotes of Bruce Lee’s. It's something that keeps me looking forward and not at the past.

“The key to immortality is first living a life worth remembering.” Bruce Lee

A Good Man Goes to War

Week 1 Weight Loss (WL): 10.4 lbs
Week 1 & 2 Total Weight Loss (TWL): 14.4 lbs

Hey Dear Readers. First, let me apologize for getting this late. I stepped on the scale today and literally had to repeat the process SIX times before I believed the results.

Second, let me say the following message before you read any further.

I am not a doctor nor am I a scientist (but man do I wish I was Bruce Banner or Tony Stark). The things I try for my weight loss are things I personally research for what I think might work for me or that I’m crazy enough to try it. So, please, if you choose to follow a juice diet or get wrapped, please look into it yourself. Be as skeptical as I was and then try it with an open mind.

On with today’s post:

So last Monday I started my 10 day juice fast. If you’re not familiar with it, juice fasting is a type of fasting and detox diet in which a person consumes only fruit and vegetable juices. I was inspired to start it after watching a documentary called “Fat, Sick, And Nearly Dead”, which you can see on Netflix. After doing some research I had tried one a while ago, lost some weight, and subsequently ended up back to the svelte weight of 299 lbs. Which inspired this big change that included blogging with Project ReRoll.

The first three days of your juice fast, let me be honest here, are going to suck big balls. You’re going to be tired, grump, and really want to quit, but that is the sugar and crap leaving your system. You are seriously detoxing your body of coffee, soda, and the crap you usually eat the same way a drug addict has to detox a chemical from theirs. So you’re body rejects that with feeling crappy and your desire to return to that bad habit get stronger.

Thus why this post is named for one of my top 10 Doctor Who episodes, “A Good Man Goes to War”, because your will is going to war with your brain and your body. The latter both just want to go back to the normal that made you what you are.

If you want to change…you can’t let them win. You must be the Doctor to their Daleks, the Gandalf to their Balrog, the Mario to their Bowser….you get the idea. And if you don’t there are some very nice TV shows, movies, and games a geek friend can introduce you to.

What I usually make is called Mean Green which comes directly from the documentary I mentioned above. You will need a juicer, but here’s the recipe.

Mean Green

• Prep Time: 5 minutes
• Total Time: 10 minutes
• Serving: 1-2 Size: 16oz. (500 mls) (I double up so I can have some for a full day and a half)

Ingredients

• 1 cucumber
• 4 celery stalks
• 2 apples
• 6-8 leaves kale
• 1/2 lemon
• 1 tbsp ginger

Directions

1. Wash all produce well
2. Peel the lemon, optional
3. Juice
4. Pour over ice if you like.
5. Enjoy! 

If you've ever had orange juice with pulp before the texture can be similar depending on your juicer. It looks green and at first your brain says “No, sir.” Yet, it’s actually kind of good.

I also make a breakfast drink which is orange and pineapple and a snack that is strawberry, blueberry, and raspberry. I got the recipes from juice bars and stores I've seen in New York. If you’re in the New York area, I am jealous of you.

Now let’s talk about the hard part…Temptation. I intentionally did not avoid normal life. Matter of fact I found ways to adapt to it. Avoiding normal life while trying to get healthy would suck, but letting myself down, and you, as well as learning how to adapt to maintain the weight loss was more important to me.
Here’s how I overcame it.

Friday I went out to the mall with my best friend, Sean, and his son, Tristan. Whenever I smelled food and I wanted to have something to nibble…I bought a bottle of water. Within half a bottle my desire to eat was gone. When Sean and his son would stop to eat, I had a bottle of water. Water does this amazing thing of filling your stomach. Negative side effect….you pee…A LOT!

Saturday I went to my sister Heather’s baby shower. Which meant I dropped my wife, Kelly, off and the guys took Dan, the awesome dad to be, and went to Dave & Busters. The guys belly up’d to the bar and I…had a glass of orange juice and a glass of water. Did it suck to smell the wings, burgers, and all the things I would normally gorge myself on? Yup. You know what sucked more? Watching that scale go up instead of down before August 1st.

That night Kelly and I went to see The Wolverine. She had popcorn and water….while I had water. And you know what? It didn't ruin anything about the experience.

Sunday I went for a 2.4 mile walk and talk with my good friend Ann. After we stopped at Starbucks, where she had tea and I had…you guessed it…water.

Before and after each I had a pre-made, by me, juice so I had nutrients in my system.

One thing I also did was tried the “It Works” wraps from my sister-in-law, Shannon, and her company Wrap with Waffediyok. After I posted that picture there was a lot of dispute in the comments about the “science” of it and so on. All I can tell you is I saw 4.25” come off my midsection and have keep about 2” off since. It, for me, was a great motivator to see change. As a onetime deal I did not expect it to provide long term solutions, but it was the boost in self value I needed to get me over the hurdle. I've had a few friends try it based off the post I made and one friend saw 4” herself from the wrap. There is a 90 plan they offer that I have seen people have results from, but I would recommend talking to Shannon if you have ANY questions. Any… and I mean any, because I’m a n00b with that stuff and asking me is going to get you “um…here’s Shannon” as a response.

So as of this post I’m on day nine of the juice fast and, folks, I have to tell you I haven’t felt better in a long time.

After I’ve gone through the 10 days, I feel clean. I don’t crave food and honestly I don’t miss it. I’m going to enjoy having a burger from a non-fast food place, but I don’t think I’ll go back to having a burger every day. I will enjoy a slice of pizza, but I don’t want to go back to ordering a whole pie for just Kelly and myself.
More importantly, I’m more aware than ever of what goes into my body and how it affects not only my body as a whole, but my mood and brain as well.

So, dear reader, I leave you with this one simple bit of motivation that I’ll expand on in my next post.
I started this blog series at 299 lbs. and here is the reason I had to step on and off the scale several times.

If I can do it…so can you!

The Return Journey

Good morning. As I prepare to start my journey of Project ReRoll I thought it would be a good idea to share with you the goals I’m setting out with and how I’m mapping out my quest to ReRoll my body.

I got on the scale today, to see where I was since I weighed myself last week when I wrote my answers to the interview that was the post yesterday. I had to step off and on the scale a few times, but when I realized the number was what it was…I stopped. I had gone up in weight. Stress of the weekend, not paying attention to what was going in, and realizing how much five days can change the dial on the scale has me more sure than ever than starting this quest, and sharing it with you, was the best thing I can do.

So, dear reader, every good quest starts with a goal. My goal is to begin, what I am dubbing, my 31 day challenge. For the month of August I am going to be working towards beginning a routine that will begin the transition from being round in the belly to an over all healthier me.

For diet I am going to do a juicing/paleo mix. Starting the first four days of the month weaning off of soda, fast food, and such by eating raw fruits and veggies. It will help transition my body, because on August 5th I will begin a juice fast that will last a minimum of 10 days. If I feel good with it, I’m going to continue and then blend in the paleo diet as I learn more about it and share that knowledge with you.

For exercise, I am going to start with doing the 30 Day Ab and 30 Day Arm work out. Each work out starts with four simple exercises you can do, without needing a gym membership, that increase each day ending with you doing, at least, 100 more reps of each exercise than the day you started. I addition to that I am going to increase the 1.5 mile walk to and from work I already do to include jogging so by the end of the challenge I am running the 1.5 miles home.

If you wanted to play along at home, I’m going to be using a few apps, that you can find as well, to help gamify my time as well. I’m going to be using the app “EpicWin” to  make tracking the work outs as much fun as RPG gaming with its leveling and rewards. I am also going to be using the app “Zombies, Run!” to track the transition from walking to running.

I wanted these goals and actions to be measurable and easy. By the end there is a quest map for you to follow if you wanted to make your own change in life.

And, like all good quests, it comes with some big obstacles. Over this month I’m attending no less than three conventions away from home. This means part of my weight loss will be, for at least 9 or 31 days, will be deep in the heart of every temptation that could set me off my path. I’m not going to these just to attend, I’m going to promote a film that’s still in the works and it’s a stressful time that can cause me to revert back to what’s easy with things like fast food, sleeping longer instead of working out, stress, and tons of alcohol.  I can share with you how you too can fit working out and being a healthier you into all aspects of your geek/nerd life just like Anne has.

As I’m going to be checking in with you once a week, these posts will be more like mini journals plotting out what I’ve done, how I feel, and what changes I’m seeing. I want to be as honest and accountable with you as I can.

Thank you for joining me on this quest to reroll my body, health, and mind. I hope this inspires you to make the changes you’ve been putting off the way that Anne has inspired me.

Mike Dougherty
Twitter.com/wickedjava
Facebook.com/mcdougherty

It's a Bird! It's a Plane! It's a Guest Blogger!

I've been hinting that there were some fun changes on the horizon for Project Reroll! Well get ready cause our first change is a-comin'! This is no longer just my story. 

I'm so excited to introduce you guys to Project Reroll's first guest blogger, Michael Dougherty. He's been a very supportive member of the reader community and is embarking on his own mission to pick new stats and slay the fat and will be making posts on Tuesdays about his own journey. This has always been a place for accountability, empathic sharing, and "teaching out" about the good, the bad, and the ugly of embracing the process of weight loss and nutrition. The process can be so different for everyone that I really think it can only improve the blog to have more than one person express what they're learning through the experience. 

So who is this Michael person? Why should you care about him? GET READY, cause he's awesome and I did a little introductory interview with him to get you all excited about hearing what he's got to say. 

 Tell us a little bit about who you are and what you do.

My name is Michael C. Dougherty and I’m a geek. Like big time. My first books I remember reading were The Hobbit, Sherlock Holmes, and tons of Edgar Allen Poe. I’ve been playing D&D off and on since 1st edition and can remember getting my first Atari 2600. 

Recently, I wrote/directed the Joss Whedon blessed and FOX approved Firefly fan film “Browncoats: Redemption” that went on to raise $117,000 for charity in one year. I’m currently working on my next film “Z*Con” which is like “Goonies” meets “Shaun of the Dead” set in “Comic Con” which will also raise money for the American Red Cross, Kids Need to Read, and the Baltimore Bully Crew.

When did you decide you needed to change your ways and was there a specific moment where it clicked and you actually committed to doing it?

It’s been a long time coming. I can’t mark a specific date and time, because I’ve been debating about it off and on in my head, as we nerds do. I’ve read lots of books, like “The Nerdist” by Chris Hardwick has a section on having a healthy body, and friends like the amazing Elizabeth Wallace have sent me stuff to help, but it was really after watching Anne/you and my friends', Jeff Pulver and Joe Hancuff, personal transformations that I believed it could be possible for myself. I just woke up one day and decided ‘I don’t want to feel like this anymore’ and signed for a CrossFit class. After that…I’ve just wanted to be the change I want to see in others…for myself.

If you failed in the past, why do you think that was?

Because I wasn’t committed. I know that and know it’s totally on me. I allowed the bullshit in my own head and the comfort of life as it was to keep me from wanting more. I allowed work and other distractions to be the “Well I don’t have time to exercise/eat right because I’m too busy doing X.” Which is just me lying to myself.

What are your goals and how do you plan to accomplish them?

My goals are pretty simple and measurable. I’m starting August 1st and measuring success in 30 day increments so I’m not stressing out over daily fluctuations on the scale. I know that I’ll decrease, increase, and plateau, but I have seen so many people give up after seeing the day to day numbers that I know I will to.

I’ll be including a daily workout regimen that increases like the 30 day ab/arm challenge. Each week I’ll check in with my results, which I’ll be tracking with the Epic Win ap. I already walk 3 miles a day (1.5 miles each way) so I want to make the evening walk home to evolve into a jog and then a run. 

I will also be starting a juice fast for the first 10 days and then see how things go. I want to adopt more paleo into my diet, but it’ll be a transition I want to make slowly so my body doesn’t go into freak out mode.

The ultimate goal is math based. I’m currently around 285 and I want to try to drop a minimum of 10 lbs a month. This equates to about losing 1% of current weight per week (2.85 lbs) which all the research I’ve found seems to indicate is healthy and reasonable. That way if I do more…great, but I’m not stressing out about it which would cause me to slip.

There are so many options when it comes to diet and fitness. Why are you choosing this particular path?

I am former military. I was never in better shape in my life than when I was forced to do daily push ups, sit ups, and running in the ARMY. It is something my body resonates with and seems to react better to then trying heavy weight lifting. Plus, I can be as ADD as I want flipping the order I do them in so I don't get bored. 

For diet, one that I’ve done before and saw physical and emotional results from. Juicing is also a very mentally relaxing task for me. It is simple, I can let my brain go, and I get to enjoy some nice juice after. I’m going to be dipping my toe into the paleo diet. That will be the biggest challenge for me. My past lifestyle has been very easy and easy made me round. So it’s time to do something else.

What made you want to guest post about your journey on PR?

I have been so inspired by Anne's/your transformation that I wanted to help contribute to the site to show what she/you did can be done by anyone! And, I'm the kind of guy who needs to be backed into a corner. My personality is such that I have to put myself in a situation where I am accountable to something greater than myself to make change happen.

If you could reroll yourself as your favorite genre character or superhero, who would it be?

I would have said Spider-Man years back, but as I get older...Logan/Wolverine. Dude's tough as nails and only gets better with age.

I hope you guys are as excited as I am about seeing Michael challenge himself to make these changes. He's an awesome geek with a lot to offer and I feel honored that he came here to Project Reroll to share his story. That being said, there are seven days in a week. How awesome would it be if I wrote on two of them (as I already do) and the others were days that guest bloggers posted about their journeys? These could be vlogs or writing. I'd love to invite geeks of all sexes, ages, and backgrounds because I really think it's important that every "transformation" be put in perspective. I want people working on weight loss, or learning a new martial art, or trying a new fitness routine- there are just SO many physical challenges out there! It would be awesome to expose each other to all these different methods and what the day to day experience of pursuing these goals is like. I believe, like Michael, that personal transformation is something ANYONE can accomplish. However, different people might have to go about it in different ways in order to find lasting success that works for them. Is there anyone else who might be up for this challenge? If so, feel free to leave a comment or contact me so we can chat about your ideas! Ideally, I'd love to find 4 other staff writers to post on Wednesday, Friday, Saturday, and Sunday.  What say you, Slayers?

How to Tell Your Friends They're Fat

Short answer: You don't. 

At the beginning of this journey, people wanted to know a lot about how I was going about losing weight and sticking to it. What was I eating? What were my fitness goals? Later on, questions started pouring in about how I felt in my new body. Was it different? Did I have more energy? However, following the publication of my "success" story on Nerd Fitness, there's been a huge upswing in questions from people who want to know how to approach their friends about their weight issues and get them to change. 

It wasn't someone telling me to lose weight that caused me to take up arms and accept the mission. In fact, for years people told me to do something about my health and the more they insisted, the more I dug in my heals. To be told by someone you trust and love implicitly that you are less than acceptable in their eyes can be extremely hurtful, and what's more, that particular "f-word" can sting forever. I still remember every time that someone used it in regard to me whether it was out of the desperation of love or as a jibe. It hurts just the same either way and you can guarantee that when that person gets ready to face their demons, they are not going to come to you for empathy, guidance, and support. 

When a doctor or a parent told me I was overweight to the point where it would affect my health significantly, aside from the very first time when I was elementary school and I wouldn't have realized otherwise, I always wanted to ask them if they thought I didn't know that. 

I look in the mirror every morning. I can see that I'm fat. It's old news. Telling me isn't going to make me have some huge revelation that I haven't had already. Seeing photos of yourself where you've significantly gained weight since the last time you saw yourself in a picture or attempting to do something you could always do physically and then finding out you're unable to do it anymore- those are the things that will make you hit rock bottom and realize that you need to change for yourself and not for anyone else. I feel like I can pretty much guarantee you that the impetus to lose weight and keep it off never came from someone telling someone else they were fat. Truly finding redemption for your body through health and fitness isn't about anyone else but you. 

That's why it can be hard when we watch the people we love going down roads we know are toxic for them. At the end of the day, you can't want it enough for them. They have to want it themselves. So how can we help them along the way?

Let's look at some successful redemption tales, shall we?

Xena doesn't decide to change her ways because someone tells her she's an evil warlord. When they do that, she laughs in their face and slaughters their entire village. She eventually changes because of the people in her life. Hercules and Gabriel see her for her potential as a whole person and not just a force of destruction.

In Buffy, Spike doesn't change his ways because of a chip in his head. That limits his behavior, but it's Buffy's presence in his life that causes him to want redemption- to chase after his lost soul. 

In Star Trek: Deep Space 9, Quark slowly changes his smarmy cheating Ferengi ways because he's deeply affected by the people living around him on the station. Without them, he wouldn't ever start sticking his neck out for people or making selfless acts.

These characters change because people in their lives set an example for them to follow that they admire.

So what do you do to be that example for your friends so they can morph into the rerolled heroes they were meant to be? 

You can love them for who they are right now, inside and out. Tell them that you do, because more than likely, they berate themselves and think they're worthless because of the place they've let themselves get to without doing anything. Tell them they matter to you. Make them feel good about themselves. If they feel good, then they'll think they're worth fighting for. 

You can "be the change you want to see in the world," as Ghandi said. Tackle your own health and addictions. Sometimes seeing someone else succeed is what will inspire someone to take charge of their own problems. 

You can educate yourself on nutrition and fitness so that when they are ready to ask questions, you have answers.

You can empathize with them and make them feel validated when they open up to you about their emotions, health related or not. That way, when they are ready to expose themselves and do the work to get healthy, they'll feel like you've created a safe harbor for them to express their trials and tribulations. They're going to need a fellowship to get that ring to Mordor and you could be a part of it. 

I'm certainly not an expert and I don't have all the answers. I just know how I've been affected by these kinds of confrontations and more importantly, how I'd like to be treated. So how 'bout it? If you have any related questions, advice, or experiences you'd like to share, please leave them in the comments. 

America the Hutt

I remember feeling like I was SO GROSS when in middle school. I was fat and unpopular. Boys in my class didn't ask me to dance at sock hops. My parents were concerned about my health and they were constantly trying to do things to get me to diet or workout. Naturally I resisted their attempts. What child wants to be told they're overweight? What pubescent girl wants to think she's the fattest/ugliest girl in her class? I didn't want to be different from the other kids who didn't belong to a gym or spend time working out after school. I wanted to go to MacDonald's after soccer practice and eat fries and a shake like everyone else. 

This is the way I remember myself.

I've spent a lot of time recounting my "success" story to people who are curious about how I got to my "rock bottom" moment (Recently I was lucky enough to share it with the awesome community at Nerd Fitness. If you haven't had a chance to check it out, give it a look-see!). Often, I start by saying that I was fat from a very young age and that I was incredibly self conscious about it. Although I participated in things like soccer and figure skating, I was never as good as the other kids. Physicality was never my strong suit. I hated my appearance and when I started to get interested in boys, I faced a string of rejections. So much of what happened during my formative elementary and middle school years contributed to my attitude towards nutrition and fitness, not to mention my self esteem. It was the bedrock upon which residency at Jabba's palace was built.

Recently, a friend posted a picture of us from middle school on Facebook. Prepare yourself to behold the behemoth female hutt, the gargantuan fatass of yesteryear. BEHOLD HER!

WHAT?!

Ok, so given the lead-up, I'm guessing you're as shocked as I was. I look like a totally normal in this picture. Curvy and Teva-clad sure, but unhealthy? No! Yet, in my head, I thought I was a troll. I was convinced I had a huge problem. 

The fact is, I might not have been working out the way I am now, but I was involved in plenty of physical activity at school and in after school sports. I rollerbladed to school a lot! I rode my bike on the weekend. The reason I couldn't keep up with kids on my soccer team was because I played with kids who went on to get soccer scholarships and play on all state teams. I was AVERAGE in terms of skill, but I was active. I just felt bad about my performance because most of my friends excelled insanely at physical stuff.

Even though I wasn't as unhealthy as I perceived myself at the time, I still developed into an unhealthy adult. I was broken just like so many obese children are today.

I'm pretty sure my parents' constant concern about staying active and eating healthy, as well as their rigid rules about what kind of foods we all ate when we were together at home, contributed to my need to act out and eat fast food, binge on ice cream, and hide candy bars in my room. I'm sure the huge gap in skill level between my friends on the soccer team and myself had a lot to do with feeling like there was no point in applying myself to getting better. 

Then again, I'm not sure how it could have been done differently. Maybe my parents pushed too hard, but if they hadn't pushed at all, then where would I have been? It's just as likely that I might have gone down the same path to the Dark Side. If they hadn't instilled in me a "no quitting" attitude, I probably would have dropped out of all my sports after they lost the glow of "newness" and I was faced with the fact that I just wasn't very good at them.  

For about two months I've been meaning to write about how I feel about childhood obesity and its relationship to parenting, but I haven't because I'm not sure I have anything useful to add to the dialogue. It's a huge problem in this country. We are 100% failing our youth in a huge way. I don't think the answer is telling them they can't ever have any cookies or candy, but at the same time I don't think we should continue to let people stay as ignorant of the content of their food and the processes it goes through before it gets to the table. I wrote a post a while ago about how much I love the fact that NYC restaurants are required to post calorie counts on their menus. Sure, not all calories are created equal, but seeing that number does help me make better choices from time to time, even when it comes to treats. There are parts of the country that don't do that. Hell, there are parts of the country that practically build shrines to butter (mmm butter). We think that's normal! If you ask the countries in the world who don't have this same issue, you'll find that it's not.

My friend Dani just visited me from Brazil. She said she was shocked by our portion sizes and by the fact that everything comes fried and with some sort of starch. I started to notice that too when I first started Nutrisystem and now that I order Paleo when I'm out, it takes a lot of effort to sort of rewrite the menu. Most of the time I overpay for what I get because it costs more to replace fries with something healthier or I have to remove so many elements from my meal that I end up with a tiny portion.  It costs more money and it takes more effort to eat right- even though I'd wager it's totally worth it.

America builds it's foods to make us fat by habit. Sandwiches come with fries naturally. On menus, you hardly ever see "Choose your sandwich and one side." They just assume you want to put fries in your face (and it's a fairly good assumption... cause they are delicious devil food). There are places that list potato salad  and pasta salad as vegetables. You can see why our youth is confused. We're hardly helping them. 

Changing our national habits seems like a huge challenge. I'm not sure where to start, but I know we have to do something. I've spent the last few months asking parents I know about how they approach health in their own homes. There doesn't seem to be a formula from success. Some had kids who more naturally adapted to healthy lifestyles even though they did nothing special to encourage them and others have kids who continually struggle in adulthood despite having a childhood where every meal was planned.

I haven't written about what I think we should do to assuage our obesity problems in this country because I only know what works for me. My friends have gotten healthier and I've gotten healthier, but we've all done it in completely different ways. Weight Watchers, Keto, Paleo- you name it! We've all found something that spoke to us and that we could do for long enough to see results. I guess the only thing I can definitively say is that we have to somehow figure out how to heal apathy when it comes to health. Gorging ourselves and eating the "wrong" things has become so normalized in our country that it's the healthy choices that seem to exist on the fringe. If someone works out every morning before work, that person "must be crazy." If someone orders a salad at lunch with friends, we all say, "Oh you're so good." Those things should be fairly normal in a healthy country- but for us, they're not because we've poisoned our collective national mind but making unhealthy treats the "norm."

We have to figure out how to make people care, but so many people don't- or they just care more about pizza than they do about not getting diabetes. Plus, the more normal these obesity-caused-ailments become, the more our kids accept them as a natural part of life. The whole reason my "transformation" has been maintained so far is because I've directly linked health to the things I enjoy in my life. I run... from zombies. I do HIIT workouts... watching Xena. I lose weight... to cosplay. You get the point.

If you're one of those people (and I know they're out there because I used to be one) who feels like they have tried to lose weight, but they've just failed time after time, then find something you love that's directly affected in a negative way by your weight and think about how much more fulfilling your life would be if you could participate in it. It might be different for everyone, but becoming personally invested in getting a better a life might be the key. Yeah it's more work than some simple answer that would solve our country's weight problems, but I'm not sure that even exists.

If a kid loves sports, then great! Tell them how much better they'll perform if they fuel their body properly. If they love video games or action movies, encourage their interests and show them what it takes to get big and strong (like this 300 workout used by the actors to prep for the film). If they hate working out, but they love to cook, teach them about food! Let them take a cooking class that specializes in nutritious dishes so that they can learn a skill that will help them their whole life. Start small and they may see the benefit of working on the things that don't come naturally when they realize it will affect the skills they're already interested in improving.

There's one thing my parents did absolutely right (and I wish every kid was as lucky!). They encouraged me to follow my passions. Had I figured out how to bring my passions and my deficits into alignment earlier on, I might not be struggling as much with my health today.

I'm interested to hear how you all feel about "the obesity epidemic" in this country and what can be done to help heal it. It's something I think about a lot because I don't want anyone to have to suffer like I did. I don't have the answers, just an inkling. I think one of the most important things is to just get people talking! So talk, Slayers! Maybe we can start to untangle this Gorgon's knot together.