How to Stop Making Excuses

Excuses are bad, mmkay? They're a slipper slope and here's why.

When I spend so much time and effort working on changing my life and writing about it so other people can get inspired to change theirs, I can get a little obsessive. 

"If I don't work out every day and eat perfectly all the time I'm letting myself and everyone else down."

Then I'll be out at some event and someone will say, "I made these cupcakes!"

It takes some convincing, but after a year of saying no, I'll sometimes say yes on these special occasions. 

Once I got down close to my goal and went Paleo, I decided I'd give myself a free day a week. Just one. How bad can one day be?

I'll tell you. It was insanity. I became an obsessed behemoth on the prowl for baked goods and ice cream. It was beyond allowing myself a treat. It was completely gluttonous. 

Then vacation came. I allowed it to be vacation. I got some exercise, but nothing like I normally do. I made a plan for how I'd eat, but I was pretty free to try whatever I wanted!

So now I'm back from vacation. I am managing to eat primal with a few exceptions... but my "time to exercise" mental muscle is just not kicking into gear. That's not something you can wait for. You have to get yourself back in the habit and make some choices that your mind isn't too crazy about right now. 

There are just too many excuses out there and the margin between rewarding myself after great behavior and just allowing myself a chance to misbehave because I want to is steadily getting smaller. That's on me. It's something I need to change. Primal allows for a serving of bread or cheese a day so I take it, whether I need it or not. I'm at a concert or comedy show? Have some drinks, eat the food there even though there's NOTHING close to Primal. Could I have packed some food. Sure. I didn't. I chose not to and I chose wrong.

This is my latest excuse; A tiny jellicle ball of cuddles and playtime named Tonks. I've spent two whole days off rolling around with her on the floor, cuddling in bed, and playing with her without going for a run or stopping for some yoga. Sure, I'm nesting, but I could have taken half and hour to an hour and done something for ME. 

So in the face of a mountain of excuses how do you gain any purchase? How do you get back on track.

I started to look back on how I started. I started with small goals and changes and kept adding. I feel like an idiot for needing to go back to that model because I felt like a super hero before my vacation and now I feel like an invalid. The first thing I did was to actively stop making an excuse the second it happened.

I was waiting in line for tickets to Shakespeare in the Park. You have to get there around 8am to get tickets and then you have to wait in line till noon when they get distributed. I was hanging out with my boyfriend and snuggling and then I thought... what am I doing? We have FOUR HOURS. I can snuggle for 3.5 and workout for half an hour. So I negated the laziness and got started on a bodyweight circuit. Sure, I got some weird looks from people in line, but I didn't care. I had the time, it was a nice day, and there was no reason to waste another moment worrying about all the reasons not to do it. There are always a billion reasons not to do something. You just have to buck up and make it happen. 

Next up, diet. For this, I feel like I need accountability and support. So, I've decided to hop back into the next Nerd Fitness challenge on the 16th and do a Whole-30 to cleanse my body of toxins and really get back in the Paleo swing. For increased accountability, I'm doing it with my friend Shannon from work. 

It sounds dumb, but the best way to stop making excuses is... well, to just stop making them one by one. If you feel like you're trying to convince yourself something okay, ask yourself why you're doing it and why you want to veer away from your plan. Most of the time, you'll find that the "reasons" you come up with make you feel ashamed because they're not really reasons at all. 

"I couldn't work out because I had to play with my cat." Seriously Anne? You are ridiculous. After hearing myself say that out loud, the next day, there I was, working out in the park even though I felt like people were giving me the "oddball" stare. 

"I'm at a comedy show. I want to have fun and I don't want the hassle of bringing food." There were people who brought chairs and coolers and blankets for the lawn seating. Would it have been that weird if I'd brought some fruit and slices of turkey with veggies? No. I just made the excuse not to. The next morning, I started out right with veggies and eggs with coffee. 

I could sit here and feel bad about it and frankly, I almost didn't write about it on the blog, but this is something we all do! It's time to make a change. It doesn't have to be big. I'm not back sliding because I needed to return to the mentality that helped me get started in the first place. I should be celebrating that I even have those tools cause I sure as hell didn't know what I was doing when I got started. 

We aren't perfect. We make mistakes. You have to remember a failure is only a failure if you stop trying.

So never stop! Bite, scratch, and crawl your way back to the top of the mountain one excuse at a time and you'll be back on track in no time. 

What excuses are you making and what are you doing to change them? Do you have any tips to share? Discuss with your fellow Slayers in the comments.

Jedi Mind Tricks & Fitness

I wish I could say I'm a total health nut who loves the gym and that I think brownies are icky sugar toxins, but I'm not. It still takes willpower to stick to my mission. I'll never stop loving days where I can completely immerse myself in a video game for hours on end or enjoying a Hobbit themed feast with my friends. For my first month, I completely avoided those things so I could create new habits and in a way, detox/wake up my body. Seven months into this lifestyle change, I've definitely indulged in some treats and devoted hours on end to adventuring in Skyrim without derailing my progress one bit. The question became, how do I use delicious treats and non-active geeky indulgences as motivation to put in the effort at the gym and the table a majority of the time? My answer: A reward system. I unlock an achievement, I get a trophy. I bribe myself to do healthy things I'm not crazy about with things I love but should only do in moderation. 

Even though I don't love going to the gym, I like the elliptical machine. After the "shiny newness" of a new health regime wears off, working out on a machine can feel a bit like subjecting yourself to being on a "hamster wheel" 5 times a week. What makes the day in/day out tedium of watching statistics flash across the screen bearable is being able to watch my favorite TV shows. I don't have time to sit down and rewatch all the shows I love, but if I do it at the gym, then it's accomplishing something instead of just marathoning them nonstop while I sit on the couch and surf the web. The bonus to this system is that it provides another fun way to measure my progress. After all, you can't always expect the scale to go down, so why not measure you're level of awesomeness by how many cult TV shows you've watched while at the gym. For the record, I've watched every episode of Firefly, Avatar: The Last Airbender, and 2.5 Seasons of Xena: Warrior Princess whilst busting my ass at the gym. Next in the queue: Buffy the Vampire Slayer. There are people who say it's detrimental to watch TV whilst exercising because you'll relax and not push yourself hard enough. To counteract this, I did research to find my optimal heart rate and I make sure that I stay in it while I'm working out. I also choose shows with a lot of kicking ass in them- usually with a female heroine I dig- so whilst Xena is bashing heads or sprinting through the wilds of Ancient Greece, I pick up my intensity. 

There are other smaller "Jedi Mind Tricks" I use to make sure I stay motivated and continue to push myself. For instance, if I try something new and truly despise it, I don't force myself to keep doing it as long as I still go to the gym and do something else. A personal example would be weight training. I tried it out when I started my gym membership, but I never felt engaged by it and I didn't really see any results despite my research and sticking with it for over a month. I just decided there were too many other active things I could be doing/trying with my time. I will note that I initially decided I hated Zumba and now I take two classes a week, so who knows? One day I might totally get back into it. In any case, I still wanted to do some conditioning and eventually I started going to yoga classes two or three times a week. I've built up my strength and balance exponentially. Plus I can measure the progress of my fitness by being able to reach new poses or stay in unmodified plank or chaturanga longer. The other evening I was able to do "upward facing dog" instead of "cobra" AND "unmodified side plank" for the FIRST TIME. I felt awesome afterwards. On days when I'm not feeling particularly "zen," I just tell myself I'm training to be the Avatar. I defy you to do "yoga warrior dance" and NOT imagine you're doing the dance of the dragons with Zuko and Aang. No kidding. That shit works every time. 

My willpower weakens significantly when it comes to video games. If I get sucked into a story or fixated on a goal in game, I will not stop until that best in slot item is mine. Seriously. I have problems.  I used to be like this:

You know, except with lady parts. Not pretty, right? A lot of people think video games are "the enemy" right now, and not just when it comes to fitness. People who know almost nothing about these games are asserting that they cause violent tendencies, rob you of real life experiences, or are senseless garbage that will rot your brain- I could talk about how I don't agree with those accusations all day. I won't because that could be its own post. One thing I can say is that they ARE addictive and that I have personally experienced gaming addiction to the extent that some of my friends had to stop the madness and screw my head on straight again. Did I to stop playing video games altogether? No. I just had to learn to enjoy them in a way that would not prevent me from persistently pursuing a marked improvement in my health. For my first month on Operation: Stop Treating Your Body Like Poop, I didn't play many video games- and certainly no MMOs (my personal crack). Once I had my fitness and nutrition routine under control, I started allowing myself to play games again, but ONLY after I'd been to the gym or done my chores. In my opinion if you're a productive member of society and you're looking after your health, who CARES if you spend 4-6 hours that evening raiding Icecrown Citadel with a bunch of pixelated buddies? I'm sure there are people who still think video games are the devil, but that's my take on the issue in relation to my own health at any rate. 

Are there things you do to bribe yourself into healthy eating and fitness habits? Leave your tips in the comments!