In the Game of Fat, You Lose or You Cry

Today was weigh-in day and I finally saw a number I could be proud of on the scale after conquering a few weeks of weight loss agony, plateaus, and starvation mode woes. I lost 5.6 lbs this week and I'm officially down 95 lbs overall! This is a very special victory for me for multiple reasons.

Reason the first! At PAX East, I went off the deep end a little bit. I spent the week prior to the convention reintroducing all the foods I'd been leaving out of my diet, as well as trying to get myself back on track and out of starvation mode. I was also trying not to obsess as much about things and therefor I wasn't planning on looking at the scale till the Monday after PAX. Then came the actual convention. Sure, I did everything right leading up to it. I packed most of my food ahead of time and I only planned to eat out for dinners and for coffee during the day. Then I realized all too late that I would need fresh veggies and I would have to get salads at the con where I wouldn't have as much control over portions or content. This threw off my budgeting both for cash and calories. I also planned to enjoy a meal at Fire + Ice in Boston on Thursday night and even though I loaded up my stir fry with a ton of veggies, I still went to the ice cream bar for desert and DESTROYED the most overindulgent delicious sundae ever complete with mint chocolate marshmallow fudge. My lack of gallbladder screamed in protest. I told it to SHUT IT. It was cats and dogs living together, mass hysteria. Once I had that sundae, my sugar addiction kicked into high gear. My boyfriend got mint chocolate cookies and I had to have one because my costume was "getting uncomfortable and eating cookies=relief." Really? What kind of an excuse was THAT? I had a brownie one night. I ate a whole chicken caesar wrap the size of a baby arm another night. It was out of control. I felt out of control and I didn't like it.

When I came back home on Sunday night I said, "That's it. You've had your fun. You need to get your head on straight now that you're home. No excuses." It was a struggle, but I persevered. I ate all the food on the plan just like I'd been doing prior to leaving. I can now say I've made it through the whole week without depriving myself of anything I was supposed to eat which is huge for me. I also resisted SEVERAL temptations along the way since did end up going out to dinner two nights in a row! However, I didn't stray. I made a plan and I stuck to it. It was agonizing and willpower draining, but I feel like I finally exorcised all the sugar and chemicals from my system and I have my eyes on the prize again.

Reason the second for celebration is that my brand new Fitbit arrived on Wednesday. It's a handy little wearable gadget that tracks my steps, my distance, and my daily calorie burn (based on my height, weight, and other statistics) and uploads all the stats to a website so I can log my food and make sure I'm hitting the right calorie deficit to hopefully lose two pounds a week. It's pretty incredible! I will do a more in depth review of the product at some point, but suffice to say, this little tool gave me the kick in the pants and the extra bit of excitement I needed to push through some of the really hard days I had this week. 

Reason the third: I found out that I'm officially not obese on the BMI scale anymore, just overweight. So instead of being a fat fat fatty, I'm just a wee bit tubby. Still, it's a huge accomplishment and I wanted to relish it because I'm never going back to that old me ever again. 

So, I ask you, what better way is there to celebrate all of these accomplishments then to assume my rightful place up on the Iron Throne of Westeros in my Megan Lara Khaleesi t-shirt. I really can't think of one. 

Stay on Target Stir-fry

Ah my monthly plateau. I've eaten perfectly all week and worked out six out of seven days and yet today at my weigh-in I find I've gained a 1.2 lbs. This happens every month right before "the time that shall not be named" and even though I know it's just a fact of life, it still drives me completely up the damn wall. Seeing a negative number on the scale can really mess with your head, but you just have to persevere and remember all the work you've put in plus how important it is to continue moving forward. As Gold Five says in Star Wars: A New Hope, "Stay on target!"

One thing I've been working on is amping up my knowledge of nutrition and various different diet plans. I've been interested in learning about Paleo even though I'm unsure if it's ultimately what I would want as far as a full time eating plan. I'm a part of the "Nerd Fitness" Rebellion and a lot of people on those forums swear by it and I can see it's appeal because it's one of those diets that really does allow you to eat a ton of different delicious things in any quantity you like as long as you avoid the big "no-nos" which are anything processed; wheat, flour, sugar or its equivalents, dairy, or legumes.

As a part of my "Level Up Your Life" 6 week challenge on the Nerd Fitness forums, I made a goal to cook three Paleo recipes in order to help me explore the plan and also remedy my lack of cooking ability, something that is going to have to change if I'm going to maintain my weight loss and eat on a budget once I reach my weight goal on the Nutrisystem plan. So without further ado, here's the recipe I came up with for stir fry!

Stay on Target Stirfry

Ingredients

• Broccoli
• Shiitake Mushrooms
• Carrots
• Chicken Breast
• Extra Virgin Olive Oil
• Garlic Powder
• Onion Powder
• Sea Salt
• Black Pepper
• Lime

1. First wash and cut up all of your veggies. I bought mine already cut up and ready to go which really cut down on my prep time so if you don't mind spending a bit more money, then awesome. Are they cut up? Great! Set them aside.
2. Next put your skillet or wok on the stove. Set the heat on low.
3. Cut up your chicken into small pieces. I prefer half inch thick slices but it's really up to you.
4. Throw your chicken into the skillet and drizzle a dash of your extra virgin olive oil on it. We're trying to be conservative with this ingredient. Now use a spatula to stir the chicken to get it all coated with the olive oil and make sure it's all spread out evenly. 
5. Now season the chicken with the garlic powder, onion powder, sea salt (be conservative!), and black pepper. 
6. Cut your lime in half. Squeeze one half over the chicken and save the other for the veggies.
7. Cook the chicken for 10-15 minutes to make sure it's cooked. Keep moving it around with your spatula every once in a while to make sure it's cooking evenly and that everything is covered in the seasoning. I also use this time to clean up after myself while I'm hanging out; wash the cutting board, the knife, clear away any packaging, etc.
8. When the chicken is done, remove it from the skillet and put it aside on a plate.
9. Dump all your veggies in the skillet. Drizzle a modest amount of olive oil on them.
10. Repeat the same seasoning process you used for the chicken.
11. Squeeze the second half of the lime onto the veggies.
12. Stir everything up. Keep moving it around so that it will all cook evenly.
13. When you think it's done, then taste one of each type. If it tastes done, then it's done! If it doesn't, keeping going and repeat the taste test process.
14. When the veggies taste done, dump the chicken back into the skillet and cook everything together for about a minute.
15. Turn off the heat and serve up your stir fry!

It's delicious, healthy, and will definitely help you stay full and stay on target when it comes to weight loss! I promise you that you'll be super excited to clean your plate and sad to see it all gone. I know I was! Let me know how you liked the recipe if you try it out!

Kicking Ass and Letting Go

I've been extremely disciplined over the last two months as a part of reaching my weightloss goal for the next convention I'm going to and also as a personal double dog dare to not only to recommit to my goal, but to challenge myself more physically. I've stuck to the Nutrisystem plan completely 6-7 days a week without flexing or eating restaurant food at all. Since January 1st, I've lost about 12 lbs and I'm just 5 lbs from the goal I have in mind for March 22. Because this is a two month exercise, I've been pushing myself a LOT harder than I intend to going forward, but I have seen some pretty remarkable results! My body is visibly changing. I can feel my muscles engaging in new ways in my yoga classes and I can work on new poses that I couldn't reach before. I've been really improving all my coordination in Zumba and my foot work is getting faster and more precise. It's really cool to see the results of your journey in your capabilities rather than just what's on the scale at your weekly weigh-in.

After losing 4 lbs./week for the last two weigh ins, I felt like my body was REALLY holding onto every ounce of fat! I only lost .8 lbs this week. For the last few days, even though I was eating perfectly and exercising a lot, the scale crept up about .2 lbs a day. It might be frustrating to look at, but I know enough about health and fitness at this point that I realize it's just my body adjusting, building muscle, and adapting so that I can continue to lose. A lot of people get really frustrated by that. On the surface, yes, it looks like you didn't measure up to one of those killer weeks where everything goes right and the scale shows a huge number. However if you stop and think about whether you made all the good choices you could have that week and your response is, "Hell yes, I'm awesome," then why waste ANY TIME thinking you're not just because that number wasn't so impressive? Don't let the scale succeed at that bluff check when you know you've done well. The work is in your control. The number is not. 

It's my friend's birthday party tonight and I've already packed my dinner, a mandarin orange snack, and a breakfast bar for tomorrow in case I stay over at my boyfriend's place. I worked extra hard at the gym today, skipped my snack this morning, and will skip out on my dessert entree tonight so that I can enjoy one of my friend's cupcakes with buttercream icing tonight! It's like I always say, set yourself up for success by planning ahead, and you can feel free to enjoy yourself later! Next on the nutrition agenda, planning for my Valentine's Day date because I know I'm going to want to enjoy that in all it's splendor! For me, planning my indulgence days makes it all the easier to stick to my diet and fitness regime 100% the rest of the time because I have goodies to look forward to!

20% Cooler and a Few Pounds Thinner!

http://timon1771.deviantart.com

Guys. I've been stuck fluctuating between the same five pounds for three weeks. It's been my most frustrating and inexplicable plateau to date and this morning at my weigh-in, the scale finally moved. The odds were ever in my favor! I've been working really hard this week, sticking 100% to my diet and hitting the gym every day for 45-55 minutes on the elliptical and then an hour of Zumba/Yoga/walking to cap it off. My body finally got the message and started losing again!

I took a Zumba class near the beginning of this journey and I could barely do it. I felt wretched and awful about it afterwards. Now 75 lbs down, I retook the class just to get an idea of how different it would be. I almost fell over when we started jumping because I was surprised by how much air I got! Haha! I kept up the whole time and had a lot of fun. So it just goes to show, as you change, your abilities change and you should always give everything (including yourself!) another chance to be awesome. You never know what you'll enjoy six months from now.

I've also really been enjoying getting back into yoga. I enjoyed it when we did it at the drama conservatory I attended even though I'm not super flexible. It helps me focus and keep my breath/body connected (which is very important as an actor). Aside from a crazy Russian substitute slave driver that we had for class yesterday, who spent more time showing us what the two advanced students could do as opposed to giving us each beginner/intermediate/advanced poses, it's been an incredibly positive experience. I'm not going to let that one negative experience stop me from challenging myself. :)

And with that! I'm going to the gym to watch Xena on the elliptical (Xena-lliptical training, as I like to call it!), followed by Zumba!

From Disappointment to Celebration

Well, my weigh-in this week was a little disappointing at first glance. I was hoping for a two pound loss considering how on top of my eating I was (guys i resisted soooo many tasty treats with my friends. Cupcakes and hot chocolate to name a few.). I feel like I might be plateauing a little bit after my crazy losses following my surgery last month. Then again I also started taking birth control again, so perhaps that's part of it. Meh.

At any rate, I did notice some positives this week! 

Firstly, I finally went shopping for new clothes! Low and behold, I was a medium and I even bought one small item (WHAT THE WHAT?), so that was very exciting. It's also pretty amazing to see people react to my new wardrobe. Now that my clothes fit, my weight loss is even more noticeable. I bought jeans for the first time in years too. Oh! AND! I dug through my closet and found my high school winter coat, which now FITS ME! I can finally stop looking like a deflated clown in a million layers and wear clothes that fit. My friend Emily said it best when she giggled, "Oh Anne, you look like a real person now!" I don't think she was implying that being fat meant that I wasn't a real person. It's just that I've been looking super schlubby in my oversized clothes for a while now and now I don't stick out for all the wrong reasons. :) 

Second, my boyfriend is back in town. His reaction to my loss over the last month was pretty intense. He hadn't seen me since after my surgery so the last time we were together I was at least ten pounds heavier and could barely move. He's proud of my accomplishments and very supportive. He won't stop picking me up and carrying me places which is weird for me because I always feel like surely I much be crushing him, but apparently not! It's been a bit of a love fest ever since his return. <3

I've also started putting together our costumes for PAX East. We did a lot of shopping for base items this week and I'm sure we'll be picking up other little things along the way. Now I need to go get some fabric so I can start sewing on the details!

So that was my week. Hopefully I'll be able to hit the gym hard and stick with the eating program and find myself BELOW 177, which apparently is the hardest thing ever. 

Officially Frustrated

I'm one of those people who weighs every day. I do it to get a sense of how my eating affects my fluctuations and to get myself used to seeing fluctuations rather than being surprised by them. 

That being said, I've eaten and exercised PERFECTLY every day this week except for Thanksgiving day and I only lost .8 lbs. The scale has been STUCK at 192.2 for 3 days and I don't get it. It's not going up or down and I've been really active. I just don't see how I can't have lost any weight at all since Thursday and it's really grinding my gears. Today is weigh-in day and I have almost nothing to show for it even though I ate pretty responsibly at Thanksgiving and stuck 100% to plan on the other days. 

I know I just need to keep working and that plateaus do happen but "MEH" I say. "MEH" indeed. I am most disappointed at this turn of events.

Plateau! In the Name of the Moon, I Punish You!

So I'd been sorta stuck in a weight loss plateau for the last few weeks. I'd been losing 1 to 1.5 lbs a week and it just seemed like everything was fluctuating a ton more than usual from day to day. I'm pretty sure it had to do with me starting on "The Pill" for the first time and my body was just adjusting. Considering many people report weight gain, I suppose I should count myself lucky that my body was capitulating to weight loss at all. I was sort of afraid I wouldn't make my goal for the "Hot by Halloween" challenge on the Nutrisystem community forums if it kept up. Needless to say, I was sort of stressed out about losing weight the entire week and I was nervous I was losing my edge.

Well, today was weigh-in day and I lost 6.4 lbs this week. That's BANANAS! I stuck 100% to my food plan and worked out 4 days with some physical activity on the others. I've heard of downward "swooshes" after a plateau, but damn! This was pretty swooshified. Normally I would have given up at a plateau, but this time, I persevered. I just kept telling myself,

"If you've done everything you can to be healthy with your diet and your fitness routine and the scale isn't moving, then just let it go! Science says that what you're doing will cause you to lose weight so stop being so dramatic and stick to the plan."

I also think, "When I'm sad, I stop being sad and start being awesome," but I digress. Science says it, guys. Science. The whole weight loss thing can be as much of a mental battle as a physical one and it's important to take stock of what you're doing and troubleshoot, but sometimes plateaus happen. Just stick to your guns. Maybe switch some dinners for lunches, adjust the times you eat, or try some new workout stuff to keep your body guessing, but at the end of the day, your body will only go as fast as it can and impatience will only drive you crazy. 1-2 lbs a week is a healthy rate. Sometimes you'll lose more, sometimes less. Just go with it. 

Yesterday I posted a quick celebration of some sports bras fitting that hadn't when I first ordered them, but what I didn't say was that I also tried on some T-shirts I had bought that hadn't fit before. It's been one of my mini-goals to be able to fit into these and I'd succeeded with two of the four so far. So I decided to try on the other two yesterday and BAM! They fit! The one below was especially exciting because there was a lot of shame attached to it not fitting before. You see, a group of friends and I all ordered the same shirts from Teefury.com (a site that releases a new design each day). The image matched the symbol for our guild in World of Warcraft (The Unicorn Alliance) and we decided we all just had to have them to wear en masse to conventions and events. Well I ordered the biggest size available thinking it would be fine, but when it came, barely even fit over my boobs, let alone my belly. I tried to laugh it off by making jokes about being the token fat-ass, but inside I was really hurting and every time they all wore them together, I felt really bad about not being able to join in. So yes, it meant the world when I pulled this on yesterday and found that finally it fit. I shared it on Facebook and everyone was super supportive and awesome. I was filled with warm fuzzies because my friends and guildies have been my rocks throughout this whole journey so far.

Never Give Up. Never Surrender

Another week, another 4 lbs GONE! Just 1.2 lbs from my 30 lbs lost weightloss goal for New York Comic Con (which is just a little over a month away). I'm not one to count chickens before they hatch, but it looks like I'll be CRUSHING that goal, which is exciting. 

I've been sick this week, but I still went to the gym. There is nothing worse than exercising whilst you're sick. I've only been able to muscle in a half hour on the elliptical for the last few days. It was definitely a struggle for me and I really felt unable to go at it the way that I normally do. At least I did SOMETHING instead of throwing in the towel. Hopefully I can lick this cold and get back in fighting shape. It's slow season for work so I'm only scheduled a few days this week. I'll be buckling down at the gym and pushing myself to get back to where I was before the storm of sick hit me.

I also realized when I weighed myself that I was due to put in measurements for the month. Last month, I sort of winged it, but I wanted to make sure I was doing it right so I looked up how to do it on YouTube and found I was measuring the waist wrong and that I was supposed to include the love handles and cross over the belly button, as opposed to the thinnest part of my torso which is just a few inches below my bust. So sadly, that added 7 inches to my waist measurement, BUT I lost about 7.5 inches from all the other areas combined. I'm sure, had I measured the waist correctly, then I would have lost there too instead of gained. Measurements are so important because sometimes when the scale won't move, they will. I can be a really great motivator in the midst of a plateau.

Anywho! Nose the grindstone! I'm off to the gym.